Leave Me Unbounded..

Fear is arising within me. Not much time is left. The urge to run away and get off the radar amplifies day by day. But I cannot. I have crossed more than quarter of a century of my life and though I am content with it sometimes and saddened at the other end of it; this has become kind of an important work for some to find for me a suitable match soon enough. To fasten me, to tie up my soul.

   A girl that I am, without a male companion of my own choice standing or holding my hands beside me or any potential match to find for myself in the near future, the kin decides to take charge and help me out by sieving out guys belonging to a good family, with a good gene pool (not mandatory, as looks can be deceptive), good figured salary et al. Until now I have managed to very casually but carefully laugh them off signalling that I am yet un-ready to entwine myself in that bond. But it’s about time that I will be loaded with (motivational for them, off putting for me) talks telling about perks of getting soaked in the marital bliss or learning to take responsibility and run a world of my own. Awakening to the wisdom and choose a man for the woman that I am.

  Just a couple of days ago I got a hurried call from one of my dearest aunts asking me about my height. It is an unusual and unexpected question from her end as she knows already that I belong to the category of females who are above their normal lengths. All befuddled and confused I let her know and that very excited voice turns a bit sad. She expected a number a bit less than what I actually told her. After inquiring about it one more time just to be sure she puts the phone down leaving me wondering what choices I am going to be showered with the next time I see her. She does it for the love of me I know that. She wants my well being. It’s the societal norms that she is worried about. 

But why the norms have to be like this? I shall never know.

  Wait a minute, don’t get me all wrong. I am not against the sanctity or rituals or the rules of getting married. I would very much like to have a family, a husband, children and dog(s) of my own. The only glitch is, not so soon. For me, this age is very tender. Not to be bound with that metaphorical string of a husband and have controlled freedom and thrusted responsibility. It is a time that I do everything just for my own self. Yes, I do need love and care and a person from the opposite sex to comfort me from time to time, encourage me, to kindle my desires and everything; but not so soon. Not in years to come. Not until I am at least half satiated with the life I am given. I want to spend the other half of my life with that person with that satisfaction. Not regret any decision and even if I do I shall not regret those regrets. I want to live free and unbound right now.