LETTER FROM AN ALMOST GROWN UP DAUGHTER

Hey Ma,

 I make even better tea now. The subtle lingering flavour of Adrak in it; just the way you liked. Though you liked me to put lots and lots of sugar, I add just a spoonful for myself. You see I have learned quite a few things now and also got better at things that I already knew. But you know, I wish you were here to witness that. You would have still cringed and chided me for all that I learnt; but I would have still appreciated it.

   

  I have learnt to be independent just as I witnessed you while growing up. I try to grant no favour from others at all. You would have liked to see that. I have calmed down unlike before too. Remember how much we fought and screamed at each other every couple of days leading to not talking to each other. Just not talking, we did everything else as usual. But now I barely fight with anyone. Besides, whom will i fight with? I’m growing up.

   

   I go to the hairdresser to style my hair now. How scared I was to go to the parlour. And it was just you who always cut my hair, even if it took you forever! That reminds me the 10.30 pm hair chopping by you ‘coz I wanted that Priyanka Chopra look from the disastrous “Pyaar Impossible” immediately. The people at salon are good enough for me now.

   I save money howsoever I can now. I know how much you scolded me for wasting your money for unnecessary things. Though I still do that sometimes, I mostly remember your, “nije jetia earn koribi tetia poisar mulyo gom paabi ”. I’m trying to save for another foreign trip now.

But mostly to your utmost irritation I am still the same at many a things even today.

   I still can’t wake up early on my own. I use alarms now. Thanks to smart phones! I still hate it! And you hated it that I hated it. And I still dislike that you used to wake me up at 5 effing 30 to just make green tea for you! Maybe you never knew, but I used to slide inside the bed and slept till 11 the moment you used to leave for school at 6.30.

I’m still messy and unorganised. I really don’t like (read: too lazy) to keep things all neat and clean. Don’t see the fun in it. You screamed at me until I did it. I still do it only when I absolutely can’t find anything in my room anymore. Please don’t haunt me in my dreams for this okay.

   And strangely in some cases, the things where we collided in interests have become similar. I remember how much you were scared of riding pillion in bikes and scooters for the fear of toppling down the ride. You would be happy enough to know that I am dead scared of this thing called riding bikes now and I don’t know why. Same thing happened with heights. Just as you used to feel giddy to look down from tall buildings and bridges; I now am extremely terrified of heights. Though, unlike you, I try to overcome that fear.

   I also know you’d have been very happy to see that they tried to ban maggi but sorry to disappoint, your daughter’s love can’t be far away for much longer. The ban has been lifted!

   I hope the next life is treating you well. I know it is. Though I miss you terribly at times. Especially when there’s a nice tall guy passing by me, or when he opens his mouth and all his appeal comes down to -2/10. :P Enjoy your five year old self and the new bodily experiences, but do feel free to visit sometimes through my dreams or like the way you did a few years ago. I know now that it was you. Sorry, I got a little scared at that time; I won’t be this time I swear.

Have a great life ahead.

Your daughter from the previous life

P.S again: I miss you.